Ole and Lena jokes are a beloved slice of Scandinavian-American humor, packed with wit and charm. In this blog post, you’ll find:
- Razor-sharp one-liners and puns that’ll have you snorting with laughter.
- Short stories so funny, you’ll swear Ole and Lena live next door.
- Jokes about marriage, honeymoons, and more, perfect for sharing with friends.
Get ready for a laugh riot with the best Ole and Lena jokes, straight from the heart of the Midwest!
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Ole and Lena Jokes
- Ole and Lena jokes are so good, they’re practically a Minnesota state treasure!
- Ole walks into the kitchen and sees Lena crying. He says, Lena, what’s wrong? She sobs, The doctor says I’m allergic to gluten! Ole replies, Don’t worry, I’ll eat all the bread for ya!
- Lena asks Ole, Why do you always carry a ladder? Ole grins, Cause you keep raising my expectations, darlin’!
- Ole tells Lena, I’m gonna be a motivational speaker. Lena laughs, You? You can’t even motivate yourself to mow the lawn!
- Lena buys a new dress and asks Ole, How do I look? Ole says, Like a million bucks… in 1970s money!
- Ole tries to fix the sink but floods the kitchen. Lena sighs, Ole, you’re supposed to fix the problem, not make it a pool party!
- Lena says, Ole, I’m thinking of getting a tattoo. Ole gasps, What, and ruin a perfectly good canvas for my flannel shirts?
- Ole brags, Lena, I ran a marathon today! Lena rolls her eyes, You mean you chased the ice cream truck for three blocks?
- Lena catches Ole eating her chocolate stash. She yells, Ole, those were mine! He mumbles, I was just quality testing ‘em!
- Ole tells Lena, I’m gonna write a book. Lena snorts, You can’t even write a grocery list without spelling ‘milk’ wrong!
- Lena asks Ole, Why’s our car making that noise? Ole shrugs, It’s just singing its favorite country song—off-key!
Ole and Lena Jokes About Marriage
- Marriage with Ole and Lena is a comedy goldmine—here’s proof!
- Lena says, Ole, after 20 years, you still don’t listen! Ole nods, Yup, selective hearing’s my secret to a happy marriage!
- Ole forgets their anniversary. Lena fumes, You forgot again? Ole smiles, Nah, I just wanted to keep the surprise going!
- Lena tells Ole, We need to spice up our marriage. Ole grabs a jar of salsa and says, How’s this for spicy?
- Ole complains, Lena, you never let me win at cards. Lena smirks, That’s cause I’m the real jackpot in this marriage!
- Lena asks, Ole, do you love me more than fishing? Ole pauses, Well, fish don’t nag me about cleaning the garage…
- Ole buys Lena a vacuum for her birthday. She says, Really, Ole? He shrugs, I thought you wanted something that sucks up my messes!
- Lena says, Ole, we should renew our vows. Ole groans, Can we just renew the cable subscription instead?
- Ole tells Lena, I’d climb a mountain for you. Lena laughs, You won’t even climb the stairs to do laundry!
- Lena catches Ole napping. She yells, Marriage is teamwork! Ole mumbles, I’m dreaming up my next big contribution…
- Ole says, Lena, you’re my better half. Lena quips, More like your better three-quarters, you slacker!
Ole and Lena Jokes Honeymoon
- Ole and Lena’s honeymoon tales are sweeter than lutefisk—and twice as funny!
- Ole books a honeymoon cabin with no heat. Lena shivers, Ole, this is romantic? He says, Snuggling’s the best warmer!
- Lena packs five suitcases for the honeymoon. Ole asks, Why so much? She winks, I gotta look good for your bad decisions!
- Ole tries to carry Lena over the threshold but trips. Lena laughs, Already falling for me, huh?
- Lena says, Ole, this honeymoon cruise is amazing! Ole mutters, Yeah, but my stomach’s sailing its own ship…
- Ole plans a romantic dinner but burns the steaks. Lena sighs, Guess we’re honeymooning on toast and love!
- Lena wants a fancy honeymoon spa day. Ole books a fishing trip and says, Nothing relaxes like reeling in a big one!
- Ole loses their hotel key on the honeymoon. Lena groans, Ole, you’re locking us out of romance already?
- Lena says, Ole, let’s stargaze tonight. Ole replies, I’m already seeing stars from that hotel bill!
- Ole tries to dance with Lena at the honeymoon resort. She giggles, Ole, your moves are scaring the seagulls!
- Lena asks, Ole, isn’t our honeymoon perfect? Ole nods, Yup, except for the part where I forgot my wallet!
Ole and Lena Jokes Pickle Slicer
- The pickle slicer saga is peak Ole and Lena hilarity—get ready to chuckle!
- Ole gets fired from the pickle factory. Lena asks, Why? Ole says, I got caught trying to slice pickles with my accordion!
- Lena hears Ole’s working the pickle slicer. She says, Be careful, Ole! He grins, Don’t worry, I’m a cut above the rest!
- Ole tells Lena, The pickle slicer broke today. Lena gasps, How? Ole shrugs, I tried slicing lutefisk with it!
- Lena asks, Ole, why’s your hand bandaged? Ole mumbles, The pickle slicer and I had a little disagreement…
- Ole brags, I’m the fastest pickle slicer in town! Lena snorts, Yeah, but you’re still the slowest at doing dishes!
- Lena says, Ole, you smell like pickles. Ole beams, That’s the sweet aroma of my pickle-slicing success!
- Ole gets a raise at the pickle factory. Lena asks, For what? Ole says, I invented the double-decker pickle slice!
- Lena warns Ole, Don’t goof off with that pickle slicer! Ole laughs, Too late—I already taught it to polka!
- Ole tells Lena, I’m quitting the pickle slicer job. Lena asks, Why? He sighs, It’s just too much of a jarring experience!
- Lena finds Ole napping by the pickle slicer. She yells, Ole, work! He murmurs, I’m dreaming up a new slice technique…
Ole and Lena Joke Book
- A joke book by Ole and Lena would be a bestseller—here’s a sneak peek!
- Ole says, Lena, our joke book needs a catchy title. Lena suggests, ‘Laughs and Lutefisk: The Ole and Lena Story’!
- Lena writes a joke for the book: Why’d Ole bring a ladder to the bar? Ole adds, Cause the drinks were on the house!
- Ole tells Lena, Our joke book’s gonna be huge! Lena rolls her eyes, Only if we sell it by the pound, Ole!
- Lena says, Ole, let’s add marriage jokes to the book. Ole groans, But then everyone’ll know I’m the punchline!
- Ole submits a joke to the book: What’s Lena’s favorite dance? Lena writes, Anything but Ole’s two left feet!
- Lena asks, Ole, who’s our joke book for? Ole grins, Anyone who thinks lutefisk is a personality trait!
- Ole says, Lena, our book needs pictures. Lena laughs, Of what, your face when I win at cards?
- Lena writes, Why’s Ole bad at hide-and-seek? Ole adds, Cause I always hide in the fridge with the beer!
- Ole tells Lena, Our joke book’s a hit! Lena smirks, Yup, it’s flying off the shelves… as a doorstop!
- Lena says, Ole, let’s sign our joke books. Ole nods, But only if I can use my lucky fishing pen!
Best Ole and Lena Jokes
- These are the cream of the crop, the best Ole and Lena jokes you’ll ever hear!
- Ole tries yoga with Lena. She says, Ole, you’re like a pretzel! He groans, Yeah, a stale one that won’t bend!
- Lena buys Ole a smartwatch. He asks, What’s it do? She says, It counts your steps… and your naps!
- Ole tells Lena, I’m entering a cooking contest. Lena laughs, You? Your specialty is burnt toast surprise!
- Lena says, Ole, let’s go hiking. Ole replies, Only if the trail leads to a hot dog stand!
- Ole gets a speeding ticket. Lena teases, What’s the rush? Ole mutters, I was late for your cooking, Lena!
- Lena tells Ole, I’m learning French. Ole gasps, Why? She winks, So I can flirt in two languages!
- Ole buys a drone. Lena asks, What’s it for? Ole says, To spy on the neighbor’s better lawnmower!
- Lena says, Ole, you’re my rock. Ole grins, Yup, solid as a rock… and just as dense!
- Ole tries to fix the TV. Lena sighs, Now it’s just static! Ole beams, Look, I invented snow for summer!
- Lena asks, Ole, why’s our dog hiding? Ole shrugs, He heard me practicing my accordion again!
Ole and Lena Jokes Prairie Home Companion
- Prairie Home Companion fans, these Ole and Lena jokes are for you!
- Ole tells Lena, I’m auditioning for Prairie Home Companion. Lena snorts, With what, your snoring symphony?
- Lena says, Ole, let’s listen to Prairie Home Companion. Ole grumbles, Only if they start telling my fish stories!
- Ole writes to Prairie Home Companion: Got any lutefisk recipes? Lena adds, Yeah, ones that don’t stink up the house!
- Lena tells Ole, Prairie Home Companion’s coming to town! Ole asks, Will they laugh at my tractor jokes?
- Ole says, Lena, I’m gonna be a Prairie Home Companion star! Lena laughs, Stick to being my backyard celebrity!
- Lena loves Prairie Home Companion’s humor. Ole says, I’m funnier! Lena quips, Only when you trip over the hose!
- Ole calls Prairie Home Companion: Can you play my polka? Lena yells, Don’t—they’ll lose their audience!
- Lena says, Ole, Prairie Home Companion’s so cozy. Ole nods, Like our couch, but with less dog hair!
- Ole tells Lena, I sent Prairie Home Companion a joke. Lena groans, Was it the one about your smelly socks?
- Lena says, Ole, let’s host a Prairie Home Companion party. Ole grins, Only if I can serve my famous bean dip!
One-Liner Ole and Lena Jokes
- Ole says, Lena, I’m on a seafood diet—I see food and eat it!
- Lena tells Ole, You’re like parking spots—sometimes you gotta circle around to realize you’re handicapped!
- Ole asks, Lena, why’s our fridge empty? She replies, Cause you ate everything but the lightbulb!
- Lena says, Ole, you’re slower than molasses in January! He grins, But twice as sweet!
- Ole brags, Lena, I’m a ladies’ man! Lena snorts, Yeah, the ladies at the bingo hall love your coupons!
- Lena tells Ole, Your cooking’s so bad, the smoke alarm cheers when you start!
- Ole says, Lena, I’m fit as a fiddle! She laughs, A fiddle that’s been run over by a tractor!
- Lena asks, Ole, why’s your shirt inside out? Ole winks, Cause my charm works from the inside!
- Ole tells Lena, I’m a morning person! Lena yawns, Since when does noon count as morning?
- Lena says, Ole, you’re my knight in shining armor! He replies, More like flannel, but I’ll take it!
Ole and Lena Puns
- Lena’s cooking is so good, it’s un-BEET-able!
- Ole’s fishing skills are REEL-y something to talk about!
- Lena’s garden is growing like a WEED—Ole’s help, not so much!
- Ole’s accordion playing is a real TUNE-up for the ears!
- Lena’s so sweet, she’s the APPLE of Ole’s pie!
- Ole’s jokes are CORN-y, but they still make Lena laugh!
- Lena’s sewing skills are SEW amazing, Ole’s shirts never looked better!
- Ole’s dancing is a real TOE-tapper—just not in rhythm!
- Lena’s pies are BERRY good, but Ole eats them too fast!
- Ole’s optimism is a BREW-tiful thing, even when the coffee’s cold!
Short Jokes on Ole and Lena
- Lena asks, Ole, why’s the car in the ditch? Ole shrugs, I was practicing for the monster truck rally!
- Ole tries to barbecue. Lena says, Ole, you burnt the burgers! He grins, Nah, they’re just extra crispy!
- Lena tells Ole, You forgot to mail the bills! Ole says, Good, now we’re saving on stamps!
- Ole buys a treadmill. Lena asks, You gonna use it? Ole says, Yup, as a coat rack!
- Lena says, Ole, the roof’s leaking! Ole replies, Great, now we’ve got an indoor waterfall!
- Ole tells Lena, I joined a gym! Lena laughs, You mean the fridge-lifting club?
- Lena asks, Ole, where’s my scarf? Ole mumbles, I used it to polish my fishing lures…
- Ole says, Lena, I’m painting the house! Lena sighs, With what, your leftover lutefisk sauce?
- Lena tells Ole, You’re late for dinner! Ole says, I was busy practicing my nap schedule!
- Ole tries gardening. Lena says, Ole, those are weeds! He beams, I’m growing a wildflower jungle!
Top Jokes About Ole and Lena
- Lena says, Ole, you’re hopeless at directions! Ole nods, That’s why I always follow my heart… to the diner!
- Ole tells Lena, I’m cutting back on beer. Lena gasps, Really? He winks, Yup, I switched to light beer!
- Lena catches Ole sneaking cookies. She yells, Ole, those are for guests! He says, I’m just a guest in my own stomach!
- Ole buys a fancy coffee maker. Lena asks, Can you work it? Ole says, Sure, I just press ‘confuse me’!
- Lena says, Ole, you never surprise me anymore. Ole grins, Wait’ll you see the pet llama in the garage!
- Ole tells Lena, I’m learning to juggle! Lena laughs, You can’t even juggle the checkbook!
- Lena asks, Ole, why’s the dog barking? Ole says, He’s jealous of my new karaoke machine!
- Ole tries to fix the toaster. Lena says, Now it’s shooting bread! Ole beams, Breakfast cannon, Lena!
- Lena tells Ole, You’re terrible at flirting. Ole winks, Not true—I charmed you into doing my laundry!
- Ole says, Lena, I’m gonna be famous! Lena snorts, For what, eating the most hotdish in one sitting?
Funny Ole and Lena Jokes Stories
Ole’s Big Fishing Trip
Ole told Lena he was heading out for the fishing trip of a lifetime. Packed his best lures, his lucky hat, and enough sandwiches to feed a small army. Lena warned him, Ole, don’t get lost on that lake! He laughed, Lena, I’ve got my compass and my gut—can’t go wrong! Three hours later, Lena gets a call from the sheriff. Seems Ole’s “compass” was just a bottle cap, and his boat was stuck in a swamp. When Lena picked him up, Ole grinned, Well, I caught a lot of mosquitoes! Lena shook her head, Next time, I’m tying you to the dock!
Lena’s Cooking Class Disaster
Lena signed up for a fancy cooking class to impress Ole with something besides hotdish. She practiced her soufflé, her sauces, even her knife skills. Ole sniffed the air and said, Smells like a five-star restaurant in here! The big night came, and Lena invited the neighbors over. But her soufflé sank, her sauce curdled, and she accidentally set a dishtowel on fire. Ole, trying to save the day, shouted, Don’t worry, folks, Lena’s just inventing smoked hotdish! The neighbors laughed so hard they forgot the meal was a flop.
Ole’s DIY Disaster
Ole decided to save money by fixing the porch himself. Lena said, Ole, you sure you don’t need a pro? Ole scoffed, I’ve got my hammer and my can-do spirit! By noon, he’d nailed his shirt to the porch, dropped a board on his foot, and somehow glued his hat to the railing. Lena came out to find Ole tangled in a ladder, muttering about “modern art.” She called the handyman, who fixed the porch—and freed Ole. Lena teased, Your spirit’s strong, but your hammer’s unemployed!
Lena’s Dance Lesson Debacle
Lena dragged Ole to a dance class, dreaming of twirling like pros. Ole grumbled, Lena, I’ve got two left feet and a bad knee! The instructor paired them up, and Ole’s version of a waltz looked like he was wrestling a bear. He stepped on Lena’s toes, knocked over a speaker, and accidentally did a spin that sent him crashing into the snack table. Lena laughed till she cried, Ole, you’re a one-man polka riot! Ole winked, At least I got to the cookies first!
Ole’s New Pet Plan
Ole came home with a wild idea: adopting a pet pig. Lena said, Ole, we can barely handle the dog! But Ole was set, picturing himself as a farmer with a pig pal. He named it Sven and built a pen in the backyard. Problem was, Sven loved escaping and eating Lena’s flowers. One morning, Lena found Sven napping in her tulips, with Ole chasing him with a broom. She yelled, Ole, your pig’s a landscaper! Ole panted, He’s just giving the garden personality!
Lena’s Garage Sale Gamble
Lena decided to clear out the garage with a big sale. Ole said, Lena, you’re selling my treasures! She replied, Your treasures are junk, Ole! The sale was a hit—until Ole started “buying back” his old fishing rods and a broken lamp he swore was vintage. By the end, they’d made $50 but spent $60 on Ole’s “deals.” Lena sighed, Ole, you’re the worst customer I’ve ever had! Ole grinned, But I got my lamp back, didn’t I?
Ole’s Karaoke Catastrophe
Ole heard about a karaoke night at the VFW and signed up, claiming he was the next big thing. Lena warned, Ole, your singing sounds like a sick tractor! Undeterred, Ole belted out “Sweet Caroline” so off-key, the crowd started howling. He tripped over the mic cord, knocked over a chair, and accidentally sang a verse in Norwegian. Lena clapped anyway, saying, Ole, you’re a legend—for all the wrong reasons! Ole bowed, I’ll take it!
Lena’s Fitness Fiasco
Lena bought a workout DVD to get in shape, and Ole joined in for moral support. Lena was all lunges and squats, while Ole flopped around like a fish out of water. He knocked over a lamp, got tangled in the yoga mat, and somehow ended up napping mid-pushup. Lena laughed, Ole, you’re exercising my patience! Ole wheezed, This is harder than hauling lutefisk! By the end, Lena was sore, but Ole claimed he’d “worked out his nap muscles.”
Ole’s Snow Shoveling Shenanigans
After a big blizzard, Ole grabbed his shovel to clear the driveway. Lena said, Ole, don’t throw out your back! Ole boasted, I’m built for this, Lena! Ten minutes in, he’d sculpted a snowman instead of clearing the path, then slipped and landed in a drift. Lena looked out to see Ole waving from a snow pile, shouting, I’m king of the mountain! She tossed him a scarf and said, Your majesty, the driveway’s still buried!
Lena’s Birthday Surprise Blunder
Ole wanted to throw Lena a surprise birthday party. He planned it all: cake, balloons, even a polka band. But Ole forgot to tell Lena it was a surprise. She came home, saw the crowd, and thought they were being robbed. She grabbed a broom and chased Ole around the yard, yelling, Who are these people?! When he explained, Lena laughed so hard she dropped the broom. Ole panted, Happy birthday, Lena—I almost died for ya!
Ole and Lena Jokes for Adults
- Lena says, Ole, let’s have a wild night! Ole replies, You mean like staying up past nine with decaf?
- Ole tells Lena, I’m cutting loose tonight! Lena smirks, Last time you cut loose, you lost your car keys in the gravy!
- Lena buys wine for date night. Ole asks, Red or white? She winks, Whichever makes you do the dishes!
- Ole tries to flirt at the bar. Lena laughs, Ole, your pickup lines are older than our couch!
- Lena says, Ole, let’s spice things up. Ole grabs hot sauce and says, This’ll heat up dinner!
- Ole tells Lena, I’m feeling frisky! Lena snorts, That’s just your arthritis acting up, Romeo!
- Lena whispers, Ole, let’s sneak away for romance. Ole whispers back, Can we sneak to the buffet first?
- Ole buys Lena lingerie. She says, For me or you? He blushes, Well, it matches my flannel…
- Lena says, Ole, you’re my bad boy. Ole grins, Yup, I forgot to mow the lawn again!
- Ole tells Lena, Let’s make sparks fly! Lena sighs, Last time, you just shorted out the toaster!
Dad Ole and Lena Jokes
- Lena says, Ole, why’s the thermostat at 80? Ole grins, Cause I’m too cheap to buy a sauna!
- Ole tells Lena, I fixed the squeaky door! Lena listens, Now it sounds like a dying goose, Ole!
- Lena asks, Ole, where’s the remote? Ole says, Check the fridge—I was channel surfing with a sandwich!
- Ole brags, Lena, I’m a grilling master! Lena coughs, Yeah, master of the smoke signal!
- Lena says, Ole, the lawn’s a jungle! Ole replies, Good, maybe we’ll find my missing golf balls!
- Ole tells Lena, I’m teaching the dog tricks! Lena sighs, He’s better at fetching your slippers than you are!
- Lena asks, Ole, why’s the basement flooded? Ole shrugs, I was testing my indoor fishing hole!
- Ole says, Lena, I’m handy with tools! Lena laughs, You hammered your thumb more than the nail!
- Lena tells Ole, You’re snoring again! Ole mumbles, That’s just my face practicing for the tuba!
- Ole says, Lena, I’m growing a beard! Lena quips, Great, now you’ll scare the neighbors and the dog!
Final Thoughts on Jokes About Ole and Lena
Ole and Lena jokes are like a warm slice of hotdish—comforting, familiar, and always good for a laugh. Whether it’s their quirky marriage mishaps or pickle-slicer antics, these two bring joy to every punchline. Share these jokes with friends, and you’ll be the hero of the next potluck. After all, nothing says “Minnesota nice” like giggling over Ole and Lena’s latest blunder!
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