66 Best Airplane Jokes & Puns That Will Have You Flying

Welcome to our high-altitude humor ride! Today, we’re soaring through a cloud of clever airplane jokes, from witty puns to punchy one-liners. Strap in and get ready to laugh your way through the skies!

One Liner Airplane Jokes

1. Why don’t airplanes ever get lost? They always take flight on the right path!
2. I told my wife I wanted to be a pilot. She told me to stop making jokes and just wing it.
3. How do you know if a pilot is at your party? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you!
4. What do you call when you’re sick of the airport? Terminal illness.
5. Why do pilots tell bad jokes? Because they always go over your head!
6. How do pilots stay cool? They keep their fans running!
7. What do you call a spacefaring airplane? A skywalker!
8. Why did the librarian get kicked off the airplane? Because it was overbooked!
9. Why don’t airplanes ever get tired? Because they always have plenty of flight rest!
10. Why was the airplane always in trouble at school? It had too many suspended classes!

Airplane Puns

1. I love flying; it’s plane and simple!
2. Airport security took my juice, said it was over the allowed liter-altitude.
3. Always trust a pilot; they know how to take things up a notch.
4. Pilots are so cool; they really know how to air out a room.
5. If you date a pilot, it’s always going to be plane sailing.
6. Pilots really make my heart soar.
7. Why are airplane jokes so uplifting? Because they’re plain funny!
8. That pilot drives me crazy. He’s always winging it!
9. Never date a pilot. They’ll just take off.
10. Air travel: The one true way to cloud your judgment.

Short Jokes on Airplane

How do pilots stay so calm? They just propeller their worries away!

Why did the airplane break up with the runway? It said, “It’s not you, it’s me. I need my space!”

How do you put a baby alien to sleep? You rocket!

Why did the student eat his homework on the airplane? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!

What do you get when you cross an airplane with a magician? A flying sorcerer!

Why did the airplane sit in the corner during the party? It had two left wings.

What’s an airplane’s favorite place at school? The flight school!

Why was the airplane so good at volleyball? It really knew how to serve!

Why do airplanes hate going to the gym? Because they hate the long runways.

What do you call an airplane that’s about to crash? An error plane.

Top Jokes About Airplane

1. Why don’t flight attendants ever play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when you’ve already told everyone to stay seated!
2. What did the airline say to the magician? “You’re allowed one carry-on, but your tricks will have to stay behind.”
3. How does a jet say goodbye? “I gotta take off now!”
4. What do you call a fear of being trapped on an airplane? Plane claustrophobia!
5. Why was the jet so admired? It had a high altitude attitude.
6. Why are airplane pilots so serene? They have their heads above the clouds.
7. How are clouds like airline pilots? When they’re not around, the day is a lot brighter.
8. What do you call an airplane that can’t fly? A ground-breaking invention!
9. Why don’t scientists trust atoms on airplanes? Because they make up everything, even the altitude!
10. What’s an airplane’s favorite snack? Plane chips!

Funny Airplane Jokes Stories

“Turbulent Talent”

Once upon a flight, a pilot announces, “Ladies and gentlemen, we might experience some turbulence.” A comedian passenger stands up and declares, “It’s okay, I’m great at stand-up—even when things get shaky!”

“The High-Altitude Proposal”

A nervous man decided to propose to his girlfriend mid-flight. As he knelt down, the stewardess accidentally bumped into him, broadcasting “He’s falling for her!” over the intercom.

“Sky-High Misunderstandings”

During a flight, a child loudly asks, “Are we small yet?” Mishearing, a nearby passenger excitedly looks out the window and exclaims, “I didn’t know we were flying over ants!”

“Lost Luggage Lament”

A passenger’s luggage was lost, and when she complained, the agent said, “We’re very good at this, we lose it and find it, just like magic!” She replied, “Great, now make it reappear!”

“The Forgetful Pilot”

A pilot forgets the PA system is on and says, “All I need now is a cup of coffee and a new co-pilot.” The co-pilot runs through the cabin to remind him everyone can hear.

“Meal Misunderstanding”

A passenger asks for “something long and hard” on a flight. The attendant returns with… a landing strip (licorice candy)!

“Cloudy with a Chance of Humor”

Why did the cloud apply for a job at the airline? It thought it would excel at flight control!

“The Overbooked Flight”

During an overbooked flight, a passenger whispers, “I knew we should have taken the train.” The person next to him laughs, “And miss this aisle show?”

“Pilot’s Weather Report”

The pilot announces, “Folks, if you look out the right side, you’ll see sunny skies. If you look out the left, you’ll see our destination’s weather forecast: Guess which side is better?”

“The Secret to Flying”

An elderly woman on her first flight nervously asks the attendant how often planes crash. The attendant winks and says, “Just once!

Airplane Jokes for Adults

1. Why don’t airlines serve whiskey at breakfast? Because it’s hard enough to handle the drunk pilots as is!
2. What’s the difference between a jet engine and a flight attendant? At the end of the flight, the jet engine stops whining.
3. What do you call a group of flight attendants in a bar? An open tab and broken promises.
4. How do you know if a pilot is at a party? They have an altitude that’s through the roof!
5. Why do pilots prefer overcast days? Because their mistakes are clouded.
6. What’s a pilot’s favorite type of music? Anything on the “charts.”
7. Why don’t pilots use dating apps? They can’t get a signal at 30,000 feet!
8. How do you impress a female pilot? Take her out for a smooth landing.
9. What do you call an airplane that’s about to crash? An incoming call.
10. Why was the airline sued by a passenger? For airing his dirty laundry in the overhead compartment!

Dad Airplane Jokes

1. I asked the flight attendant how she handles annoying passengers. She said, “I just wing it!”
2. Why was the math book sad on the airplane? It had too many problems to carry onboard.
3. What do you call a pilot who flies unsafe airplanes? A daredevil with a ‘terminal’ condition!
4. Why can’t airplanes play cards on short flights? Because the flight ends before they can even deal!
5. How do you know when a dad is about to say an airplane joke? The air pressure suddenly drops!
6. What did the pilot say to his son before his first solo flight? “Don’t altitude-y to your mother!”
7. Why did the pilot sit on his watch? He wanted to “time” his flight.
8. What do you call an airplane that doesn’t need to land? Perpetually boarded!
9. Why are airplane jokes always over people’s heads? Because they’re just plane funny!
10. What did the pilot dad say after a rough landing? “Well, we’ve arrived, but the landing was not plane sailing!

Airplane Jokes for Kids

1. Why did the airplane get sent to its room? It had a bad altitude!
2. What do you call a flying teddy bear? An air bear!
3. How do you know when there’s a pilot at your party? The noise levels will go way up!
4. Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the airplane’s tire!
5. What kind of chocolate do airplanes like? Plane chocolate!
6. Why was the airplane so good at school? It could really soar in exams!
7. How do airplanes stay in touch? They sky-pe!
8. What’s an airplane’s favorite game? Hide and seek—because they always hide in the sky!
9. What do you call an airplane that writes books? A plot pilot!
10. Why don’t airplanes ever get cold? Because they have lots of fans!

Funny Airplane Jokes

1. What’s the difference between a bad golfer and a bad pilot? A bad golfer goes, whack, “Darn!” A bad pilot goes, “Darn!” whack.
2. Why don’t flights ever get bored? Because they have plenty of in-flight entertainment!
3. How do you know if a pilot is at your BBQ? The steaks are never higher!
4. What did one airplane say to the other? “Stop winging it!”
5. Why do flight attendants never get mad? Because they always take things up a notch!
6. Why was the airplane so energized? It just had a great power nap!
7. What do you call a nervous jet? An anxious Airbus.
8. Why do ducks make great pilots? Because they never quack under pressure.
9. What’s a pilot’s favorite basketball move? The sky-hook!
10. Why was the broom late? It missed the sweepstakes flight!

Dirty Airplane Jokes

1. Why don’t airlines have movies anymore? They prefer to keep their passengers in suspense!
2. What’s a pilot’s favorite pick-up line? “Can I take you on a non-stop flight to heaven?”
3. How do you impress a flight attendant? By joining the mile-high club solo!
4. Why are airplane stories so risqué? Because they always have a cockpit!
5. What do pilots and photographers have in common? They both make frequent passes at the models!
6. Why did the pilot blush? Because he saw the runway was all stripped down!
7. What’s a pilot’s least favorite type of music? Plain rap.
8. Why was the airplane cabin so steamy? Because the pilot really knew how to turn up the heat!
9. What do you call an honest pilot? A rare sighting!
10. Why was the flight attendant annoyed? Because the pilot kept talking about his “thrust.”

Best Airplane Jokes

1. Why do airplanes never get homesick? Because they’re always on cloud nine!
2. What do you call a plane that’s about to crash? An “Errorplane!”
3. Why was the math book sad on the plane? Because it had too many problems and couldn’t solve for ‘x’ altitude!
4. What do you call a fear of stuck elevators in an airport? Terminal velocity!
5. Why don’t birds tell jokes when flying? Because it’s too “hawkward.”
6. How do you know you’re flying over the wizard school? The brooms are double-parked!
7. What does a pilot do on vacation? Nothing, they just wing it!
8. Why was the flight attendant so happy? She got to hit the runway instead of cleaning it!
9. Why are pilots the calmest people? Because they know how to wing it even when the engine fails!
10. How do you catch a flying fish? With a sky net!

Paper Airplane Jokes

1. Why did the paper airplane break up with the origami bird? It felt too folded under pressure!
2. What do you call a well-traveled piece of paper? A frequent flyer!
3. How do you catch a cheating paper airplane? You paper-trail it!
4. Why did the paper airplane get lost? It took a wrong turn at the desk corner!
5. What’s a paper airplane’s favorite music genre? Rock and fold!
6. Why are paper airplanes such good storytellers? They always unfold great tales!
7. How does a paper airplane find its way back home? It follows the return address!
8. What do you call a paper airplane that can’t fly? Stationary!
9. Why did the paper airplane join the debate team? It wanted to increase its air time!
10. How do you keep a paper airplane in suspense? I’ll tell you later…

Knock Knock Airplane Jokes

1. Knock, knock.
   • Who’s there?
   • Howard.
   • Howard who?
   • Howard you like to fly with us today?
2. Knock, knock.
   • Who’s there?
   • Cargo.
   • Cargo who?
   • Cargo “beep beep,” fly airplane zoom!
3. Knock, knock.
   • Who’s there?
   • Tara.
   • Tara who?
   • Tara-mac is ready for takeoff!
4. Knock, knock.
   • Who’s there?
   • Abby.
   • Abby who?
   • Abby birthday to you, let’s celebrate on this flight!
5. Knock, knock.
   • Who’s there?
   • Annie.
   • Annie who?
   • Annie body seen my luggage?
6. Knock, knock.
   • Who’s there?
   • Willie.
   • Willie who?
   • Willie be able to make this flight on time?
7. Knock, knock.
   • Who’s there?
   • Justin.
   • Justin who?
   • Justin time for boarding!
8. Knock, knock.
   • Who’s there?
   • Alaska.
   • Alaska who?
   • Alaska the pilot if we’re almost there!
9. Knock, knock.
   • Who’s there?
   • Wendy.
   • Wendy who?
   • Wendy door shuts, that’s when this plane leaves!
10. Knock, knock.
    • Who’s there?
    • Otto.
    • Otto who?
    • Otto know what time we land?

Airplane Crash Jokes

1. Why don’t secrets last long in a crashed airplane? Because they always come down to earth.
2. What do you call a survival tip at an airplane crash site? Groundbreaking!
3. Why did the airplane crash diet? It wanted to lose altitude quickly!
4. How do you survive an airplane crash? Stay on the ground!
5. What’s a pilot’s least favorite type of crash? A stock market crash—they prefer the skies!
6. What did the airplane say after a bumpy landing? “I’m just falling for you!”
7. Why do crashed planes make terrible storytellers? They always break off at the climax.
8. What do you get if you cross a snowman and a crashed airplane? An icy reception!
9. Why was the airplane crash considered artistic? It made an impression!
10. What’s a ghost’s favorite place in an airplane? The crash site—spooky and deserted!

Airplane Pilot Jokes

1. What do you call a pilot who flies small planes? A little flippant!
2. Why did the pilot sit on his wings? He wanted to wing it a bit!
3. How do you know if someone’s a pilot? Don’t worry; they’ll tell you within a minute!
4. What’s a pilot’s favorite knot? The tie that binds at 30,000 feet!
5. Why was the pilot a bad musician? He always left his audience up in the air!
6. What does a pilot do on a date? He elevates the conversation!
7. Why don’t pilots write novels? They can’t decide on a plot until the last minute!
8. What do you get when you cross a pilot with a magician? A flying illusion!
9. Why did the pilot bring a ladder? He heard the job had its ups and downs!
10. What’s a pilot’s least favorite type of drama? High altitude tension!

Airplane Food Jokes

1. Why don’t you ever starve on an airplane? Because of the ‘plane’ food!
2. What’s the deal with airplane meals? They’re always up in the air!
3. Why did the tomato turn red on the airplane? It saw the salad dressing!
4. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours on an airplane? Nacho cheese, but it’s always plane!
5. How do you describe airplane food? It’s never first-class!
6. What did the passenger say after eating the airplane meal? “That was a bit of a runway disaster!”
7. Why did the coffee file a police report on the airplane? It got mugged!
8. What kind of chocolate do you get on an airplane? A plain bar!
9. Why was the bread upset on the airplane? It was feeling a bit crusty about the altitude!
10. What do you call a flying vegetable? A plain pea!

Airplane Mechanic Jokes

1. Why did the airplane mechanic sleep under the plane? He wanted to get up close and personal with the nuts and bolts!
2. How do you know if an airplane mechanic is done for the day? The propellers stop spinning!
3. What’s an airplane mechanic’s favorite tool? The one that screws up the least!
4. Why did the airplane mechanic break up with the turbine? She found it too exhausting!
5. How does an airplane mechanic fix a broken engine? One wing at a time!
6. Why are airplane mechanics always calm? Because they bolt under pressure!
7. What do airplane mechanics do at a bar? They have riveting conversations!
8. Why don’t airplane mechanics play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when your cover is always a plane!
9. What did the airplane mechanic say after fixing a tricky engine? “Now we’re really flying!”
10. Why was the airplane mechanic sad? He had too many missed connections!

Final Thoughts on Jokes About Airplane

Thank you for joining us on this comedic flight through the skies! We hope our collection of airplane jokes, from high-flying puns to turbulence-inducing one-liners, has given you plenty of reasons to smile and laugh. Remember, humor can make even the bumpiest of flights a bit more enjoyable. So the next time you’re jet-setting or just dreaming of your next vacation, share a joke or two; they might just make your journey and that of your fellow travelers a little lighter. Safe travels and clear skies ahead, and don’t forget to keep the laughter soaring!

What’s Next?

• Dive into a frosty world of humor with our selection of jokes that’ll melt your heart, perfect for chilly days or any fan of snowy antics.
• Take a deep dive into the ocean of laughter with our shark-themed jests, sure to make a splash at your next gathering.
• Embark on an adventure with our collection of Pokémon puns, ideal for trainers of all ages looking to add some fun to their journey.